Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne has stunned political and economic commentators by announcing plans to introduce a tax on self pleasure. A spokesman for number 11 said ‘Over the years successive governments have sought to generate extra income ...Read More

Government officials are today preparing options for a non-military response to the conflict in Syria following a humiliating defeat for David Cameron in a parliamentary vote on Britain’s involvement in any US-led strikes. The Conservative-Liberal coalition were defeated by ...Read More

A new poll has revealed that the British public think that Dubstep is the worst thing ever, beating off stiff competition from war, famine, pestilence, plague, Hitler and One Direction. Speaking from a sound proofed bunker under Downing Street, ...Read More

Zimbabweans are going to the polls in a fiercely contested election which have been hit by allegations that the vote isn’t ‘sufficiently corrupt’. President Robert Mugabe, noted electoral reformer and all round good guy has amused observers by saying ...Read More

A UK-wide survey into the happiness levels of the nation has found ‘small improvements’ in people’s happiness over the last year. However The Marmot has learned that in many parts of the country people are wondering exactly who it ...Read More

Legal history was made today when the House of Lords voted to allow a controversial amendment to UK law to pass its second reading and be entered into the statute books. Thought to be inspired by the French concept ...Read More

David Cameron has announced plans to get Internet service providers to create filters to prevent ‘objectionable’ search terms from returning any results. He has also suggested that if the web firms do not comply with the request voluntarily then ...Read More

A new report published today suggests that the majority of British housing is now of such a poor quality that scientists may have to reclassify wallpaper as a structural item. Included on a list of complaints among residents were: ...Read More

The Marmot has learned that a plan to introduce a £500 cap for people on benefits have been derided this week. The trial is being rolled out in four London boroughs – Croydon, Bromley, Haringey and Enfield. Initial reports suggest ...Read More

  The Government is to delay plans to introduce plain packaging on cigarettes in the UK following pressure from consumers and the tobacco lobby. Instead of featuring graphic warnings about the dangers of smoking and a complete absence of ...Read More