JK Rowling

JK Rowling

Days after being outed as Robert Galbraith, the unknown author behind ‘The Cuckoo’s Calling’, JK Rowling’s initial regret has turned to anger when her downstairs toilet malfunctioned sending literary poo juice all over her home.

“I have today discovered how the leak occurred. A tiny number of people knew my pseudonym and it has not been pleasant to wonder for days how a woman whom I had never heard of prior to Sunday night could have found out something that many of my oldest friends did not know. After flushing her head down the bog repeatedly I am now confident that it won’t be happening again.”

Some observers have claimed that the whole scenario was a stunt to boost sales of the book, which has now been revealed to be part of a trilogy called ‘The Bullshit Excuse’.

Speaking from atop a pile of £50 notes, her agent Mark Derringer said “I know there’s been a lot of speculation about the real reason for hiding her identity and widespread mockery of the lead character’s unlikely name. However this isn’t the first time a celebrity has tried to boost their profile with a mess involving a Cormorant.”

The first story about Cormorant Strike

The first story about Cormorant Strike